no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
