How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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