Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
