yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
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I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
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After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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