bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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