I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
My ass is underappreciated
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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