miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
