Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
