Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize