Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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