are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize