Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
