I bet he comes in French.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
How does it feel to date your dad?
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize
