WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
she pinky promised me she was 18
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
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