Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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