So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
