It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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