i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
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Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
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I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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