Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
You're like the curious george of whores
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize
