go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
we should paint friendship bongs
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