I need help removing her.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
