i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
