two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
dude. I can hear the air.
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