i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
