if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
