i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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