i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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