Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
