BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Can vaginas get frostbite?
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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