I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Randomize
