Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Randomize