Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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