First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I wear drunk well.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
