did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
