How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
