I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize