ugly people sure do ruin things
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
