At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
