talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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