I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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