You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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