But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
