ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
