The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Randomize
