what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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