Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
