Texts From Last Night

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  (917): View more from New York City

  HIV tests are more positive than that guy

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  (917): HIV tests are more positive than that guy http://tfl.nu/rakl
  Replies (1) Good night (1136) Bad night (1592)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed

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  (617): Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed http://tfl.nu/d8dr
  Replies (15) Good night (3480) Bad night (1217)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."

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  (248): Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching." http://tfl.nu/eoit
  Replies (59) Good night (1122) Bad night (3323)
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  (510): View more from California

  just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?

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  (510): just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right? http://tfl.nu/dlby
  Replies (57) Good night (4236) Bad night (987)
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  (315): View more from New York

  making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke

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  (315): making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke http://tfl.nu/o15u
  Replies (9) Good night (4920) Bad night (1112)
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  (315): View more from New York

  I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.

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  (315): I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite. http://tfl.nu/f93w
  Replies (8) Good night (4365) Bad night (855)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times

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  (775): My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times http://tfl.nu/d78u
  Replies (15) Good night (4260) Bad night (1083)
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  (518): View more from New York

  I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.

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  (518): I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold. http://tfl.nu/adho
  Replies (4) Good night (2104) Bad night (1067)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.

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  (901): He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless. http://tfl.nu/gg4g
  Replies (5) Good night (3927) Bad night (843)
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  (916): View more from California

  The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.

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  (916): The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu. http://tfl.nu/i9o3
  Replies (3) Good night (1735) Bad night (502)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.

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  (937): Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life. http://tfl.nu/0u64
  Replies (9) Good night (882) Bad night (438)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.

  (1-719): View more from Colorado

  Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!

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  (719): My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck. (1-719): Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER! http://tfl.nu/1zbw
  Replies (1) Good night (1711) Bad night (436)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"

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  (814): I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!" http://tfl.nu/71ex
  Replies (11) Good night (767) Bad night (438)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!

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  (+44): When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!! http://tfl.nu/wuxe
  Replies (4) Good night (747) Bad night (343)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.

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  (512): He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker. http://tfl.nu/4xj0
  Replies (5) Good night (459) Bad night (348)

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