He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Randomize
