You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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