At least make sure they are 18
Why
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
