trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
