It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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